• We are a group of licensed Marriage and Family Therapists dedicated to building strong, loving,
    and happy relationships. We all want the same things: trust, connection, peace, love, and quality living

    Our counseling services are all about you, your goals,
    and your deep desire to live a love-filled life
    with your partner, your children, and your extended families.
    We specialize in attachment-based therapies for individuals,
    couples, children, families, and those bringing home
    new family members through adoption and blended marriages.

    The Attach Place

  • Attachment Therapy

    Strengthening The Whole Family

    The Attach Place

  • The Art (And Science) of Raising Happy Kids And Teens

    Compass, RoadMap, GPS And a Parenting Handbook

    The Attach Place

  • In love and happy

    couples counseling that works

    The Attach Place

  • Healing Hearts, Minds And Bodies

    Helping People with Love and Care

    The Attach Place

  • Neurofeedback works

    Change Your Brain And Change Your Life

    The Attach Place

 

Welcome to The Attach Place

 


    Attachment-based Therapy for Individuals, Couples, Children, Teens and Families

Our Mission   is to provide competent, attachment-based help to those who seek stronger connections, emotional healing and wellness, lasting relationships and loving family lives.


We believe that Love Matters in every relationship. We practice therapy that way, too.



Attachment Therapy



We welcome individuals, couples, children, teens and families.


We are a group of like-minded and like-hearted licensed Marriage and Family Therapists specifically experienced and trained in attachment-based therapies of all kinds—Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy, Theraplay, Dyadic Developmental Psychotherapy, Attachment-based Treatment for Attachment Challenged and Special Needs Children and Teens, Therapeutic Parenting, Narrative Therapy and more.


Parent Training



The Attach Place offers Trust-based Relational Intervention, Attachment Parenting, Trust-based Parent Training, and Therapeutic Parenting Education.


Trauma Therapy



The Attach Place offers attachment-based trauma therapies—EMDR, Neurofeedback, Hemi-Sync, Trauma Focused Cognitive Behavior Therapy and Dialectical Behavior Therapy.


Training and Supervision for Clinicians



The Attach Place offers training and supervision for clinicians and other qualified professionals in Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy.

--Ce Eshelman, LMFT

Founder

The Attach Place








    Attachment-based EFT Couples Therapy Proven to Create Loving, Lasting Relationships

Emotionally Focused Therapy:   At The Attach Place; we use Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) to help couples re-connect and grow close, even after long periods of disconnection and strife. EFT targets the emotional bond between the couple. When people feel safe, accepted and cherished, they can navigate any issue together. As couples learn to make repair, reach and respond to vulnerability, stay connected even when talking about tough issues, they heal. The research on EFT shows that 75% show complete recovery and 95% experience marked improvement. EFT works.


The Cycle:   Often when couples make the decision to come to couples counseling they are on the precipice of divorce. Maybe that’s where you are. You aren’t sure that you can change or your partner can change or if either of you wants to change. You wonder, “Does my spouse even like me? Will I ever be enough? How will I ever trust him/her again? Do I matter to my partner?” You feel alone and unwanted and every moment in the marriage can feel heart wrenching and soul draining. Divorce begins to make sense.


Most couples in our office have experienced some of these deeply painful feelings in varying degrees of intensity and none of it is predictive of divorce.


We know it feels hopeless. Often it’s not.

fighting couples

Healing is possible. If there has been an affair or another betrayal, healing is still possible. It’s not easy and you may be at the base of a very large mountain, but there is a way up. Similarly, no matter what has happened to you in your early life, you were born to give and receive love. It’s in your DNA. It’s hardwired. No matter how badly you’ve been hurt or how damaged and broken you feel, love is your birthright.


Here at The Attach Place we use Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) to help couples re-connect, even after long periods of disconnection and strife. EFT targets the emotional bond between the couple. When partners feel safe, accepted and cherished, they can navigate any issue together.


Gay Couple

EFT works by changing the climate of your relationship. You learn that you are irreplaceable and needed. Even when fights occur, the sanctity of the bond is not forgotten but ultimately made stronger by the conflict. You have the benefit of the doubt for one another and you accept imperfections and inevitable mistakes. But most importantly, if you feel rejected by your partner or left alone, you know how to reach out for reassurance and make repair together.


The research on EFT shows that 75% show complete recovery and 95% experience marked improvement. If you have further questions or would like to schedule an appointment, give us a call at (916) 403-0588.


  1. Identifying the cycle. The cycle is the enemy. Everyone feels vulnerable sometimes. Life is inherently dangerous and we are hardwired to need love and connection, which makes us vulnerable to getting hurt. We all have our idiosyncratic ways of protecting ourselves. You might drink too much, or move away from emotions and stay in your head. You might lash out in anger or you might work too much. Your protective mode begets your spouse’s protective mode. You ramp up and then your spouse ramps up. You escalate each other, until you forget that underneath the escalation (the yelling, the logic, the shutdown) is the vulnerable heart that is always longing to give and receive love. So in the first stage of EFT, we are like detectives unpacking our emotional experience so we can see what is protective mode and what is vulnerability. Over time you forget which is which. You begin to identify so strongly with the ways that you protect yourself from hurt that you lose touch with the tenderness.

  2. After we identify the cycle and you collectively understand the ways you inadvertently contribute to the disconnection out of a misguided attempt to connect—then it’s time to reach for one another. You show your partner the tender and vulnerable parts of your heart. Vulnerability is the gateway to love. Vulnerability has many faces. For example, vulnerability can be found in the phrases:

    • I love you.
    • I don’t know what to do.
    • I feel like I’m failing.
    • I’m scared of not making it with you.
    • I’m sad

    Then--from a place of vulnerability--you ask for what you need.


    For example:


    • I need you to give me the benefit of the doubt even though I'm not perfect.
    • I need your reassurance.
    • I need your acceptance.

    When we ask--from a place of tenderness--it strengthens the bond. Of course, often we ask for what we need from a place of frustration. Then it registers as a complaint or a demand and we end up more alone.


    If it's an easy thing to say to your partner, it's probably not vulnerable. Vulnerability feels like a risk. It is a risk, but it's the only way forward. The bond is strengthened when you feel loved and vulnerable at the exact same time. This is tricky. When the cycle is entrenched, we often need help to get out of it.


    older couple

    Solution:


    By joining forces against "the cycle" and risking from a place of vulnerability, the climate of your relationship changes. You begin to feel accepted and cherished. You learn that you are irreplaceable and needed. Even when fights occur, the sanctity of the bond is not forgotten but ultimately made stronger by the conflict. You have the benefit of the doubt for one another and you accept imperfections and inevitable mistakes. But most importantly, if you feel rejected by your partner or left alone, you know how to reach out for reassurance and make repair together.


    Parent Support, Training and Coaching for Raising Happy Children and Teens

Parenting is one of the hardest jobs on the planet. Definitely underpaid sometimes. The Attach Place is here to help parents feel competent and confident in making connection and making correction. Our children need us to hold direction for them as they make their way through their developmental milestones into adulthood.


Where's the Handbook?  you might ask. How do I deal with Social Media? Homework? Sexuality? Drugs and alcohol? Step-parenting? Divorce? Grief? School failure? Depression? Disrespect? Traumatic events? Self harm? Dishonesty? Teen drama? Mental health issues? ADHD? Out-of-control behavior?


That is what we are here for: helping you navigate the way through the rough spots of raising children and teens.



For Parents:


This is what you will find here.





  • Understanding, empathy and compassion for what you      as a parent are going through.
  • Pathways for creating a happy home: structure,      corrective communication, responsibility, creativity,      and compassion.
  • Trust-based Relational Intervention¬© and Theraplay¬©      to support engagement, connection, autonomy, and      responsibility.
  • Guidance for understanding the neuroscience of      emotions in children/teens and parents.
  • Methods that actually work for reducing tantrums,      arguing, violent outbursts, and running away. Help to      remove roadblocks to communication between you                                                                                                                 and your child or teen.
  • Support to develop self and partner care, because your life is important, too.
  • Genuine help to increase your capacity for joy, playfulness, and meaning in your family      life.
  • Trust-based Parent Training Courses.
  • Daily YOU Time adoptive parent inspiration emails.
  • Adult Neurofeedback Therapy.
  • Trust-based Parent Training Courses.
  • Daily YOU Time adoptive parent inspiration emails.
  • Adult Neurofeedback Therapy.

For Your Child or Teen:


This is what you will find here for your child or teen:




  • Understanding, empathy, and compassion for what is happening.
  • Opportunities for art expression, identity development, play expression, and      therapeutic play when needed.
  • Skill building to help move smoothly toward developmental milestones.
  • Tools to identify and manage emotions in a pro-social manner.
  • Help to remove roadblocks to communication.
  • Internal resources for accepting responsibility for making good decisions.
  • Genuine help to increase capacity for joy, playfulness, and meaning in family      life.
  • Skill-Building Groups.
  • Child/Teen Neurofeedback Therapy.

    Power Therapies for Brain Change and Restorative Healing

The Attach Place Center for Strengthening Relationships provides therapies that work in a deeply efficient manner to bring about healing in the brain. The healing is observable by both clients and loved ones, in discreet and dynamic ways. These therapy approaches are considered part of a new class of treatments called Power Therapies.


Power Therapies provided at The Attach Place Center for Strengthening Relationships:

Neurofeedback   for Adults and Children utilizing the high-powered BrainPaint system. When the brain is given information about itself, it has an enormous capacity for change. Neurofeedback provides the brain with real-time information and asks it to make adjustments. The brain responds immediately. Changes in the brain due to neurofeedfeedback tend to correlate with decreased trauma, improved behavior, mood stabilization, affect regulation, deeper sleep, finer focus, sharper performance and increased attention. Neurofeedback directly influences neuronal firing, which improves activation, inhibition, and cortical stability, while balancing regulatory mechanisms.


Eye-Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR) for Adults and Children   was developed by Francine Shapiro, Ph.D. Francine Shapiro has given a life-transforming gift to the world by her rigorous development of a science-validated approach to soothing the suffering of our small and large life traumas. Our experiences are remembered in networks of interconnected neural patterns that can later create maladaptive ways of thinking, feeling, and behaving that may form prisons of the mind, forcing us to live in automatic ways we may believe we cannot change. Yet how we focus the mind can actually change the very structure of the brain itself. The key is to know how to use our awareness to create this important healing.


--Daniel J. Siegel, MD
Clinical Professor of Psychiatry, UCLA School of Medicine
Author of The Developing Mind and Mindsight


Brainspotting   is a powerful, focused treatment method that works by identifying, processing and releasing core neurophysiological sources of emotional/body pain, trauma, dissociation and a variety of challenging symptoms. Brainspotting is a simultaneous form of diagnosis and treatment, enhanced with BioLateral sound, which is deep, direct, powerful yet focused and containing.


--David Grand, Ph.D.
Developer of Brainspotting
Brainspotting BSP


Emotional Freedom Techniques (EFT Tapping, also know as Tapping)   is a universal healing tool that can provide impressive results for physical, emotional, and performance issues. EFT operates on the premise that no matter what part of your life needs improvement, there are unresolved emotional issues in the way. Even for physical issues, chronic pain, or diagnosed conditions, it is common knowledge that any kind of emotional stress can impede the natural healing potential of the human body.


EFT combines the physical benefits of acupuncture with the cognitive benefits of conventional therapy for a much faster, more complete treatment of emotional issues, and the physical and performance issues that often result. While related to acupuncture, EFT does not use needles. Instead, we use a simple two-pronged process wherein we (1) mentally "tune in" to specific issues while (2) stimulating certain meridian points on the body by tapping on them with our fingertips. Properly done, EFT appears to balance disturbances in the meridian system and thus often reduces the conventional therapy procedures from months or years down to minutes or hours.


--Gary Craig, EFT Developer


Sensorimotor Processing   is a body-oriented intervention for tracking, naming, and safely exploring trauma-related, somatic activation, creating new competencies and restoring a somatic sense of self. This technique focuses first on stabilization and symptom reduction. Sensorimotor processing can be easily and effectively integrated into psychodynamic, cognitive-behavioral, and EMDR-focused treatments.


Hemi-Sync®   are audio CDs that deliver a combinations of signals that can help individuals achieve laser-like focus and concentration. Depending on the intended goals, music, verbal guidance or subtle sound effects are combined with Hemi-Sync® signals to strengthen its effectiveness. Naturally, Hemi-Sync® sleep products incorporate predominately Delta frequencies; learning products predominantly Beta, and so forth. Users remain in total control as these recordings do not contain subliminal messages. Hemispheric synchronization does occur naturally in daily life, but typically only for random, brief periods of time. Hemi-Sync® can assist individuals in achieving and sustaining this highly productive, coherent, brain wave state.


    Comprehensive Treatment for Attachment Challanged Children and Teens

Our Approach To Attachment Therapy



This is the approach to treatment you will receive at The Attach Place. Please take a few moments to watch this video.


couple in snow

For Parents:  If you have been to see many professionals for help, you are likely tired, angry, and skeptical. Some of you may even feel desperate and hopeless. Unfortunately, many well-meaning, though ill-informed, professionals may have steered you down paths that have only made matters worse.

This is what you will find here:



  • Understanding, empathy and compassion for what you have      already experienced.
  • Pathways for creating a healing home: structure, corrective      communication, responsibility, creativity, and compassion.
  • Guidance for understanding the neuroscience of attachment       challenges and how that relates to unwanted behavior and       behavior change.
  • Therapeutic support to understand your own attachment needs and challenges that impact corrective      parenting.
  • Support to develop self and partner care.
  • Genuine help to increase your capacity for joy, playfulness, and meaning in your family life.

couple in snow

For Your Child:  Your child may be unaware of your struggles to find help. Or maybe the opposite, plenty aware and plenty burned out on repetitious, intrusive questions and moving from one professional to another. They may even have been called treatment resistant. Treatment resistance occurs when an attachment challenged child meets up with numerous professional helpers who are not effective in treating traumatized, attachment challenged children and their parents.

This is what you will find here for your child:




  • Understanding, empathy, and compassion for what they have already experienced.
  • Developmental therapeutic support to increase capacity to give and receive love and affection.
  • Tools to identify and manage emotions in a pro-social manner.
  • Internal resources for accepting responsibility for making good decisions.
  • Genuine help to increase capacity for joy, playfulness, and meaning in family life.

Neurofeedback Can Pave the Way for Attachment

Neurofeedback Solutions is affiliated with The Attach Place, Center for Strengthening Relationships located in Sacramento, California.


You might be wondering how neurofeedback has a natural connection to supporting attachment. I know I did when I was first searching for help with my attachment challenged children. As an Attachment Specialist and the Director of The Attach Place Center for Strengthening Relationships, I am pleased and overjoyed to report the success neurofeedback is having with softening the wounded, protected hearts of attachment challenged children, especially toward their parents. No kidding.

--Ce Eshelman, LMFT

Attachment Specialist, The Attach Place





One of the major issues facing attachment challenged children and their families is the almost impossible to repair emotion regulation disturbance within and between family members. Neurofeedback can collapse the resistance to emotional engagement, increase the acceptance of "no", and further the embrace of rules and even reciprocal affection. Neurofeedback changes relationships every day, even when there may be little motivation to change at the start.


Neurofeedback Solutions Testimonials




Contact us today and we can connect you with other parents who are happy to speak with you about their experience.


If I can write something or talk with parents, I want to do it. This program is amazing. Neurofeedback with you is truly a miracle for our son and our family. My friends keep asking me what I am doing. My husband says he has his wife back. --Mother of a Reactive Attachment Disordered 15 yr old



My daughter is so much more affectionate. --Mother of a 12 yr old attachment challenged adopted daughter



She has been easy to be around for two weeks. Two weeks without one blow out. First time ever. --Mother of a 5 yr old attachment challenged adopted daughter



I am definitely getting better. I feel better. --Adopted 16 yr old boy



I am forever indebted to you. I feel myself again for the first time since we adopted the kids. --Mother of two challenging adopted children



For more information about treatment for Reactive Attachment Disorder, Complex Development Trauma, and other challenges of adoption, go to The Attach Place or SacramentoAttachmentSpecialist.com.

Attachment Challenge and Complex Developmental Trauma

Treatment FAQ





  1. What exactly is the treatment process?

  2. Attachment Challenge and Complex Developmental Trauma can be treated in a number of ways. As a matter of fact, there are so many approaches to this difficult set of symptoms that most parents are confused, frustrated, and overwhelmed when trying to find help for their child and their family. Many families have gone from one therapy approach to another, and another, until their child is treatment averse and the parents are angry, exhausted, and hopeless.


    • Foremost, parents are the change agents in this treatment process. Treating the parents' Posttraumatic Stress symptoms, depression, and anxiety is essential and must come before all else.
    • Parents are educated and trained in attachment parenting, therapeutic parenting techniques, and the neuroscience of attachment and complex trauma.
    • All family members are supported to develop affect regulation skills. Neurofeedback is an excellent resource for correcting the fear-based brain of attachment challenged children and parents.
    • Parents are coached to practice radical loving and firm structuring in order to create a safe environment for their child to begin the healing process.
    • interventions, such as those used in Theraplay(c), and corrective communication process, as in those taught in Trust-based Relational Intervention(c), to help the child.
    • The child is supported to develop a coherent narrative with his/her parents in order to make sense of the past, ground in present reality, and prepare for a future of attached, loving relationships.
    couple in snow
  3. How much does it typically cost?

  4. We wish we could say it was free, because you deserve that if you are struggling with an attachment challenged child. However, we must charge a fee for our services. Again, the cost is highly variable and dependent upon the intensity and duration of treatment. Services can be calculated by an hourly rate or a monthly fee may be negotiated for a bundle of services at a reduced rate. Most families need a bundle of diverse services, so we are very open to negotiating a reasonable extended payment plan. We will also work with insurance companies, adoption assistance, victim compensation programs, counties, mental health agencies, and state entities in order to get your child the help s/he needs.

  5. How long does treatment take?

  6. Length of the treatment Attachment Challenge and Complex Developmental Trauma is highly variable and dependent on the age of the child, the degree of abuse, neglect , and attachment disruption in the first two years of the child's life, other organic disabilities, degree of bond between the parents and the child, the amount of prior failed treatment strategies, and the ability of the parents to maintain regulated emotional states in the presence of their attachment challenged child.

    Since parents are the primary change agent in the life of their child, direct therapeutic interventions may take 6 months to 2 years. Therapeutic parenting will be ongoing throughout each developmental milestone into adulthood.


    Trauma Treatment for Healing Deeply

Trauma impacts a person's ability to experience joy and well-being in life and relationships. If you are traumatized in childhood, it is likely that you will be developmentally challenged in your maturation and ability to function in life under any amount of stress. Here you will receive specialized training in DBT and Trauma Focused Cognitive Behavior Therapy practices, as well as treated with EMDR, Neurofeedback Therapy and Affect Regulation Therapy, which will help you recover your confidence, decrease emotionality, increase your sense of personal safety, open access to your loving feelings, and re-energize your relationship with yourself and your loved ones. Peace can be yours again.

Watch this 9 minute video of Robin Shapiro, Ph.D. to help you understand how Trauma Therapy works. At this center a variety of trauma treatments are used to reduce the after effects of trauma on children and adults.



For more from Robin Shapiro on Attachment and Trauma, click here.


Neurofeedback,  for brain training that helps heal brain-based trauma reactions and many other symptoms and problems including depression, anxiety, sleep disorders, ADHD, ADD, PTSD, emotional dysregulation, fears, panic, chronic pain, migraines, irritation, agitation, impatience, mood swings and more. For more specific information, click here.


Hemi-Sync Technology,  for brain hemispheric synchronization through generations of complex, multilayered audio signals, which act together to create a resonance that is reflective in brainwaves characteristic of specific states of consciousness that promotes well-being, concentration, restfulness, peace, and stress reduction.


Eye-Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR), for children and adults experiencing a variety of reactions due to trauma, including Post-Traumatic Stress symptoms, such as flashbacks, re-experiencing past events, disturbing swings in emotion, anxiety, fear, and hypervigilence.


Trauma Focused Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (TF-CBT), for supporting, challenging, and correcting the after effects of trauma on the thinking and action processes.


Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT), for processing paradoxical life experiences both cognitively, practically, and mindfully.


Affect Regulation Therapy, to develop an understanding of the neuroscience of emotion regulation and to experience behavior change through practicing regulation skills.

    Neurofeedback Solutions for Emotional Wellness, Attachment, Trauma, and Sports Performance

People seeking therapy just want to feel better. Fortunately there are brainwaves that are related to our feelings (both good and bad) that cause reactions to people, places and experiences. Our Neurofeedback professionals will assess you through a battery of questions derived from a large, highly effective UCLA study to determine protocol suggestions that prioritize the training of specific brainwaves related to better emotion regulation.


The objective is to teach your brain to balance and not be reactive in response to events out of your control. It is a common human experience to feel happy if things go your way, and angry, frustrated or depressed if they don’t. BrainPaint assists you to live in a state of “What is” rather than in “What should have, could have, and would have.” Instead of getting your way, you perceive options that are better than your way. Instead of getting your way, you get what you want.


Intimate relationships tend to stir our most basic survival mechanisms. When we fear losing what we have or not getting what we want, we have a tendency to regress into childlike states of relating. These patterns are defense mechanisms for subconscious fears and distorted beliefs about who we are and how others are being.


When we are in these reactive states, our frontal lobe shuts down – this is the part associated with emotions, reasoning, problem solving and parts of speech. When this happens, we react in extremely predictable patterns, and there is no chance for constructive communication or harmonious resolutions. At these times, all we are wired for is survival and control, which only intensifies the initial problem. Neurofeedback can change survival reactions into reasoned responses. Isn't that what we all seek in our partners, children and friends?


If you are an amateur athlete, professional athlete, or weekend warrior, neurofeedback can help you perfect your game. Brainwave training can reduce competition related anxiety, decrease reactivity at the starting line, and produce states of high capacity learning for imprinting the perfect swing, perfect catch, perfect goal, perfect response during the stress of the athletic endeavor. Neurofeedback is used by Olympians the world over to improve performance. Neurofeedback improves all aspects of your game and can solidify the future of your child's competitive edge.